Hi friends,

This third installment of the How Not to Explode series is centered around a concept that quietly shapes everything in our lives: the meaning we assign to our experiences.

One thing I've consciously worked on — and have gotten pretty good at — is noticing when a thought pattern isn't serving me, pausing, and choosing a different interpretation. The more I've observed my own reactions, the more I've realized that most things that happen are neutral... until my nervous system, beliefs, assumptions, or past experiences layer a story on top. And though I may feel strongly about something in the moment, my feelings often shift once I get a wider sense of why things unfolded the way they did.

By remembering that multiple things can be true at once, you reclaim the freedom to choose an interpretation that serves you rather than stalls you. You may not be able to control the circumstances that show up, but the meaning you make of them is the part you do have influence over. If we forget that, we may start to believe that life is something that happens to us, instead of something we're actively co-creating.

Masonry
​I heard a story recently about two masons tending to the same wall. When asked what they were doing, the first said, "I'm laying bricks." The second replied, "I'm building a cathedral."

Same task. Both factual answers. But they're living in two completely different emotional realities.

Our daily life often works the same way. We move through neutral moments — an inconvenience, a conversation, a delay — and our interpretation turns it into either a weight or a sign. We have this incredible ability to intentionally make meaning out of the mundane, yet often we don't even realize we've assigned any meaning at all.

So which interpretation should you choose?
The one that feels better. The one that supports who you're becoming.
The one that looks for growth instead of confirming defeat. Failure becomes impossible when you allow every experience to teach you something new.

When you understand that you can choose the meaning you take from your experiences, you unlock a new kind of emotional leadership — one that supports your growth instead of draining it.

Reframe Prompts
​Practice emotional leadership whenever you're feeling overwhelmed or spiraling by asking yourself:

• What story am I creating here, and is it true, helpful or necessary?
• What is neutral here that I'm assigning meaning to?
• What here is mine to carry, and what is simply not?
• What interpretation feels supportive of the version of me I'm becoming?
• If multiple things can be true at once, which truth brings me peace?

Remember: not everything is yours to carry.
Sometimes the most grounded, honest choice is to assign no meaning and let something remain neutral. And when you're not weighed down by the things you cannot change, you'll have far more capacity to address what is yours with clarity and strength.

Meaning doesn't have to be discovered, it can be chosen. Choosing the better-feeling meaning isn't delusional or "toxic positivity." It's a grounded form of personal guidance and an act of self love.

You get to decide what a moment becomes, you get to choose what's yours to carry, and you get to decide how it weaves into your bigger story.

xo,
Christen